Get out of the car!

(This is a supposedly a true account recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida)

An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs: "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!"

The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They gone out and ran like mad.
The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags in the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition.

She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat.

A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake.

The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.

No charges were filed.

Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.

sursa aici

Melodie pentru zile ploioase

A venit si toamna. Mai repede de cat as fi asteptat-o. Zile mohorate, in care trebuie sa pornesti spre munca atunci cand nu ai vrea nimic altceva decat sa tragi mai tare patura peste tine si sa mai dormi o ora sau doua. Zile care par sa semene intre ele, dar observi cum se dezbraca tot mai mult natura de vesminte, iar nuditatea ei e stanjenitoare pentru buna ta dispozitie.
Cana de ceai pe care nu ai fi dorit-o in vara asta torida devine deliciul orelor care se scurg incet. Arome si gusturi noi si vechi. Frunze moarte si minunatii de crizanteme pe care ai vrea sa le iei acasa de la toate florariile din cale. Culegi din dulap haina groasa in care te simti atat de bine si incerci sa treci peste lucrurile marunte care alcatuiesc viata si sa te bucuri de ea. Viata e frumoasa. Trebuie sa ne amintim mai des acest lucru.

Joke of the day

Now this is just Minnesota funny.

The Presidential election was too close to call. Neither the Republican candidate nor the Democratic candidate had enough votes to win. There was much talk about ballot recounting, court challenges, etc., but a week-long ice fishing competition seemed the sportsmanlike way to settle things. The candidate that caught the most fish at the end of the week would win the election.

Therefore, it was decided that there should be an ice fishing contest between the two candidates to determine the winner.

After much of back and forth discussion, it was decided that the contest take place on a remote frozen lake in northern Minnesota .

There were to be no observers present, and both men were to be sent out separately on this isolated lake and return at 5 P.M. with their catch for counting and verification by a team of neutral parties. At the end of the first day, John Mc. returned to the starting line and he had ten fish.

Soon, Obama returned and had no fish. Well, everyone assumed he was just having another 'bad hair' day or something and hopefully, he would catch up the next day.

At the end of the 2nd day John Mc. came in with 20 fish and Obama came in again with none.

That evening, Harry Reid got together secretly with Obama and said, 'Obama, I think John Mc. is a low-life, cheatin' son-of-a-gun. I want you to go out tomorrow and don't even bother with fishing. Just spy on him and see just how he is cheating.'

The next night (after John Mc. returns with 50 fish), Harry said to Obama, 'Well, tell me, how is John Mc. cheating?'

Obama replied, 'Harry, you're not going to believe this, but he's cutting holes in the ice.'

Experience Counts